Maybe it's because this past Saturday was the Fourth of July or because I just finished The Bridges of Madison County (if you're not familiar, epic love story where neglected Iowa housewife meets charming, rugged photographer by happenstance) but I've been thinking...
…In matters of the heart, to steal a phrase from a very wise one Ms. Bradshaw, is it foolish to expect “fireworks?” Regardless if you appreciate this term - or if you'd rather use butterflies, connection, "when you know you know" - there's something to be said in this culture for the mystic involved in finding the 'right' person.
Or, is a spark nothing more than attraction parading as love after years of exposure to various messaging and Hollywood movies?
My therapist says the spark might be the sense that a man is unavailable. Unpacking this as we speak, but that's a blog post for another day! My best friend says the spark may be too heavy a reliance on the physical connection. Both say it’s time to try something new. But I’m not so sure I’m ready to give up on the idea of it just yet.
Wikipedia defines a chemical reaction as a process that leads to the chemical transformation of one set of chemical substances to another. Take out the science part - never my favorite - and that sounds a lot like something else, right? Like what happens between people who are in love? If we follow this theory, I am not sure you have love without chemistry. (Though it can certainly go the other way around...)
That said, are the often-undefinable feelings something to keep in mind when judging a potential mate? i.e. if it's there it's there, and if it's not it's not. Or is it that when you have two decently compatible humans, with the right circumstances and some time, something special grows? (Such as what happens HERE when hydrogen peroxide and potassium iodide are mixed in proper proportions to create the magic known as elephant toothpaste.)
Maybe I would know the answer if I had more than basic 10th grade chemistry. Speaking of high school, I feel like this quote was plastered on any available wall space, and is relevant for our discussion here: "Reach for the moon. Even if you miss you'll land among the stars." I want the electrifying, physical/emotional/spiritual, consuming, 'we're the only ones that must feel like this' sort of relationship. But the question that remains, then, is: should I be reaching for the stars instead?
Let's talk about this! Leave a comment below.
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